Sunday, January 29, 2012



manhattan (by rrosalyndestearnn)

the future.

Today's the last day before studying life resumes.
I think I can safely say that I'm stable at the moment; mentally, physically and spiritually.
Pray that this is going to be a good semester for me, for us all.

I don't know about you, but I'll make it.
You just watch.

Friday, January 27, 2012

true story, bro

Thursday, January 26, 2012

a phoenix, rising up from the ashes

What was I thinking? Punishing myself and being so sad over something, ANYTHING, when I've got tons to be happy about?
This always happens to me. When you're just too caught up, you tend to forget what's important.

It's alright. If we didn't make any mistakes, how would we learn right?

I am done with that shit.
I am strong.
I am beautiful.
I am loved.
And I have You, Allah.

Sayonara, alter ego. I won't miss you.

Saturday, January 21, 2012

au revoir

Who knew I got so much anger in me?
All it takes for a nasty blow up to happen is a girl and her monthly menstrual cycle which comes in a package of hormonal imbalance + stupidity + cooped up emotions and a whole lot of crap that can lead to her not thinking straight. And wisely, if I might add.

It's 3.29 AM right now and we're leaving for the airport at 4.45.

I don't even know why I'm not asleep. There are two major reasons why I should not leave sleep.
Major reason A) I'll be left with my thoughts and I'll play through all the "what-if's" scenarios in my head and go loco all by myself. *cue music* all by myseeellffff... don't wanna be all by myseeelfff anymoreeee 
Major reason B) I'll get hungry.

Speak of the devil. My tummy just growled.

At the moment, I'm emotionally unstable. I'm a hopeless wreck. But I do hold up pretty good most of the time I even impress myself. Hey, guess I am cut out for theater.
When all I want is just my bunny...
But what do I get?

May this trip help me find inner-peace, restore my chi and ignite my strength for what's to come. Especially uni (which is resuming in one week's time).

This trip might be exactly what I need right now.


Thursday, January 19, 2012


Photo story

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

if my mind was the sky, the stars would be my thoughts

I know it's too early for me to think about these things.
But replaying the things we did on "my day" in my head over and over again,
I can't help but wonder,

if it meant something to you?

Monday, January 09, 2012

on my list

of movie must watch for this year.

Seems a bit familiar, to us all. No?

Saturday, January 07, 2012

if we loved each other a little bit less

This could just be the answer to why some relationships don't work. A translation from a croatian song.

If we loved each other a little bit less,
we might have even stayed a we,
possibly could have made a better we.

If we loved each other a little bit less,
we might have even liked each other.
If we loved each other from a healthy distance,
we probably wouldn’t care as much about the little things.

If we loved each other a little bit less,
we might have even stayed a we.

If we loved each other more rationally,
if we didn’t wear our hearts on our sleeves,
if all we did was simply love.
If we loved each other a bit less fatally,
if we could have focused less on dreams,
if all we did was love.

If we loved each other a little bit less,
we might have even stayed a we,
though a different we.

If we loved each other a little bit less,
we might have even liked each other.
We shouldn’t have tried so hard to please one another,
in the labyrinth of hopes and desires.

If we loved each other a little bit less,
we might have even stayed a we.

Overthinking can ruin things sometimes. Don't live in your fears, live in the moment instead. So that maybe, just maybe, you and your lover can stay a we for a long time.

Friday, January 06, 2012

she spoke words of wisdom

2011. As I reflect upon the events that I've ventured throughout that year, I realized that I've grown a lot.
Rejection, failure, starting over... Everything made me even stronger. The mistakes I've committed. No regrets, keep making them, for you'll never learn if you never try.

Here's a list of what has happened to me last year:

  • Started off the year by getting four stitches on me right knee. Aye, I'm clumsy and unfortunately, very fragile despite my tough exterior. 
  • Lived in Brunei with Dad for a month. Not the best time of life, but it was nice living with him again (for a long time that is).
  • Got my first ever job which is a sales coordinator (a.k.a. a salesgirl) at Dorothy Perkins. Gained a lot of experience and met every possible type of shopper there is. Also encountered a few weird shebangs while I was working. Epic troll moments.
  • Entered uni-life. Boy, what an adventure.
  • Had a few prayers answered by God. Alhamdulillah, forever thankful.
  • Met a lot of new people. Everyone of them is a miracle.
  • Reinforced my 11-year-old bond with Saskia. Going on 12, and forever to go!
  • Mastered a new skill before the year ended. I NOW KNOW HOW TO ICE SKATE. 
Lots of things happened. Had a couple of confessions. Had a lot of confusions. Had a lot of lost moments.
But regardless of all the adverse eventualities, the beautiful memories are too sweet and significant that they outweigh the bad ones. Not the most suckiest year I've had in the 18 years I've lived. Hm.

I don't really have a lot of new year's resolution because I always end up not doing them.
All I want to do, is improve in every aspect. And...

continue to be cute. Meow.